Wylde's Best: Matt Walsh

The man himself

As we all know, Oscar Wylde lives on through his devoted followers, such as myself. Thus, it is my privilege to introduce one of Oscar's biggest targets of derision, Matt Walsh. It's not that Walsh is always wrong. But as they say, a stopped clock is right twice a day, and a third time when you're drinking.

Matt Walsh is known as a prolific writer for The Blaze. He spends his time worrying about what everyone else is doing. Perhaps this is why he's been depressed and sometimes feels overwhelmed. After all, worrying about what everyone is doing is probably exhausting. He's not without some high points though. By calling out Planned Parenthood for their evil ways (after all, how can killing the defenseless be defended?), he uses his platform for good. Additionally, he's willing to point out bad politicians on both sides of the aisle. This is generally a good thing.

So why does Wylde deride Walsh so much? Well, firstly, Walsh comes across as a bit pretentious. His posts usually exceed 2000 words with little reason. Oscar would often copy posts (excerpts in his time) onto paper and edit them to make them better, as seen in Wylde's Books. In modern times, his followers do the same with Word and bloggers like Matt Walsh. Between his repetition and not getting to the point, most of Matt's posts can be reduced to 1000 words or less.

What's more, Mr. Walsh has rather one dimensional thinking. Even aside from the points brought up in Wylde Notions: Deism, Matt has a hard time making a point without resorting to appeal to authority, a logical fallacy. I admire that he sticks to his guns, in this case his faith, but he can't seem to make a point outside of it, or to demonstrate why it's supposed to be true. If it's in the Bible, he has an argument. That's about it.

Matt Walsh advocates spanking, sees mental illness as a spiritual struggle, and thinks all Left leaning people are evil. This sentence usually shows how the previous sentence is a joke or exaggeration; it is not. He fails to see how mental illness is generally, but not limited to, imbalances in brain chemicals. Or that spanking can traumatize children and teach them that might makes right. And also that there are decent Left political people, especially those who are pro-life. As can be guessed, his non-Biblical arguments are often straw men and appeal only to third graders.

Matt's favorite target

As Matt struggles to make a point outside of his usual rhetoric, conservative leaning thinkers such as myself look on in embarrassment. Speaking for myself, I try to see things from a modern Utilitarian viewpoint. That is, improve the overall good for everyone. While I disagree with welfare systems, I refuse to make a straw man of people who do and thus shut down any debate before points can be made. This is opposite of Matt Walsh's style. Rather than learn why people hold certain views, he simply demonizes them.

Rather than admit his views are too simplistic to interact with the complex situations of life, Matt doubles down and insists that he;s right because of the Bible. Then again, he often declares himself correct as a Professional Sayer of Truths and doesn't always appeal to the Bible. But when he does, he's run out of ideas.

Now I'd like to close with a quick note. Mr. Walsh views blog posts like this as trying to ride on his popularity. While I might get more views because of using him as subject matter, that's not my aim. My aim is to take a sober look at how he does things and reveal him as the amateur he is. He avoids critique and ridicules dissenters. It's time he took a serious look at the shilling he does.

A Wylde Rush: Cosby Edition

I'd like to take the time to write the facts on Bill Cosby and his drug fetish. Over the last week I've heard confusing news stories and quotes, so I'd like to clear the air with no distractions.

Cosby drugged every single one of them.

Let's review what we know. Over the last year, every woman and their mothers came out accusing Cosby of trying to further their careers. This annoyed Cosby and in most cases he denied doing such a thing. The times he did help further a career, he insisted that each woman took a special drug to make them better at acting.

Cosby Cat was the one to collect the drugs

Not a distraction

So how did Cosby get away with it all? Until recently, he was able to pin the whole thing on his accomplice, Cosby Cat (pictured here). Cat was the one to get the drugs for Bill. and once Cat mentioned going public, Bill became furious and blamed Cat for everything. Bill made up the story that while he was attending to something else, Cosby Cat would drug the women. Then, Bill stated emphatically, Cat would put on a Bill Cosby Mask and attach a strap-on so he could molest the women involved (some pictured above).

Cat's lawyer wasted no time in collecting stories from the victims. They recollected only colors and shapes, so Cat was out of luck. All of the women remembered a black shadow looming over them and the feeling of a phallus in different places.

To save himself, Cat threw his life on the mercy of the court. Once he confessed to getting the drugs for Bill, he was let go on probation due to his help. Bill is now wanted for 523 acts of molestation, 757 counts of sexual assault, and various other charges. When asked to comment in an interview, Bill said, "As my friend OJ would say, if I did it, I didn't get caught. At least until that damn cat lied about me." 

It's going to be a Wylde Ryde

First, I'd like to thank my hero, Oscar Wilde for the inspiration to start this blog. He came to me in a dream one night and I asked him, "What are you doing here? What do you want?" He responded, "I want you to start a blog about serious things for me, as I am dead." I thought this was a rude interruption to my dream and said, "And how do you ask?" He grinned ear to ear and yelled "YES PLEASE!" Satisfied, I began plotting the serious nature and material of this blog. As "Wilde Time" is already taken, I had to change the I's to Y's. This is a serious change but it cannot be helped.

Let me remind you once again, this is serious stuff! When I say that someone is a pigfaced, smelly fathead, I'm not trying to start something, I'm just reporting something in a serious way. "Only the facts, ma'am" and that sort of thing. Rarely, I will inject my opinion to elucidate what I am reporting so that it stands out more. I have decided not to mark this in any way, as it would detract from the serious nature of this blog.

For example, when Michael Vick was arrested on dogfighting charges, a section would look something like this:

Michael Vick was recently apprehended by police for information regarding dog fights that he was allegedly part of. Vick denied these claims, but the officers pressed further. "Is it true that you yell 'Go Lillipup!' and then hurl your dog into the ring?" Vick replied smugly, "Naw dawg, I yell, 'Eat his face, Growlithe!' For serious man, learn your Pokey Manz." Police then arrested Vick due to his indirect confession. I would have yelled, "Go, Raikou!" but that's just me.

Not a distraction

Not a distraction.

As you can see by that last line, I highlighted Vick's comments by adding my own. Recall that this is a serious blog with serious stories. There are no distractions or other nonsense preventing you from getting the best information possible. Look forward to updates on politics, deism and religion, sexy tyme stuff, and more!